Finding Love and Acceptance Among Sisters

February 12, 2021
Written by: Nicole Mina, Iota Psi, University of Texas/Arlington

I was born in Colombia and moved to the United States at the age of five. Growing up, I really struggled fitting in as an Afro-Latina. To some people I was “Black” and to others I was just “Hispanic.” I would always hide details of my background because I got tired of hearing “Woah, you speak Spanish? But you’re Black.” It wasn’t until my final years of high school, and now in college, that I have found peace and love with myself. A big part of that was feeling accepted regardless of the color of my skin, where I was born or the language I speak. When I first decided to join Greek life, I was scared because I didn’t look like what I thought a ‘sorority girl’ looked like. All I knew about sororities I’d seen in movies or tv. When I met different sororities at my school, I found myself stuck. I was so consumed by the idea I wouldn’t blend in, I even created all these false scenarios of how things would turn out. I would ask myself, “Do I join the sorority where I fit in perfectly and resemble every member of that chapter, or do I get out of my comfort zone and join a sorority that truly makes me feel good regardless of the color of my skin.” I was worried that I would be judged if I didn’t automatically pick a multicultural sorority and others would think I’m ashamed to be Black. Growing up a comment I always heard was “Why do you talk like a white girl?” That stuck with me and was one of the things I kept racking my brain about when picking a sorority. I worried that members would say I’m trying too hard to fit in by the way I talk and by the sorority I choose. I almost felt like I was in a battle with myself, but I followed my gut.

I didn’t let my doubt get to me and I met the most amazing woman one day at a welcome back BBQ. Since I was a commuter, I really lacked the social experience at my university and felt like I would never make any friends. A few Delta Zeta members approached me, and I had a true and genuine conversation with them. They didn’t try to sell me their sorority, they simply wanted to know more about me and how my first semester of college was going. This made me feel special because I felt like they saw me as more than another person they could recruit. I explained to them I may be transferring in the semester that followed and how I wouldn’t be able to go through recruitment. They still talked to me, and I knew I made a good group of friends that day. Although I didn’t go through recruitment that semester, the women at Delta Zeta kept in contact with me and proved that no matter what, they were there to be my friends and that’s where my love for DZ began.

My sisters accepted me before knowing any of my background. They welcomed me into their sisterhood and without a doubt made me feel like I belonged. For once I didn’t feel judged or that I had to explain myself to everyone. I didn’t have to put up a front to be liked by the women in DZ. I used to have a completely different idea of what it meant to be in a sorority, and I was completely wrong. I followed my gut and it led me to the right place. A place where I feel free and loved, a place where I belong and, in a chapter, where I can be myself. My mother has taught me to treat people with kindness, so when that was reciprocated back to me through my sisters, I felt so complete and content with life.

In DZ I’ve been able to meet so many people. I’ve grown closer with the Greek community on my campus and have been able to speak with alumnae about their experiences. Now I am fortunate enough to be my chapter’s Vice President of Membership. I’ve gotten to work with my sisters on a new level and I love it. I’ve learned so much and developed skills that will help me way beyond my college experience. Not only have I gained amazing leadership experience, but I was fortunate to get an Internship through Delta Zeta as well. So many possibilities I wouldn’t have known came from simply joining a sisterhood. A sisterhood that loves unconditionally and makes you feel like you belong. If I would have known I could make it this far with DZ I would have joined the minute I stepped foot on my school’s campus. Every time a woman interested in recruitment asks me about Delta Zeta, I find myself going on and on because I will always have so many memories and experiences with my sisters that I want to share. I cannot wait to continue this journey and to see where it will lead me. I love my sisters so much because they have showed me how to love and accept myself.

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